It's nice to see that Spaceman fashion is finally being addressed. It has been a
problem for far too long. Until recently, every spaceman you would see on the street would be either naked or wearing one of those ridiculous silver body suits. Never a sweater or a nice loose fitting pair of slacks. I'm sorry, not to get off the subject but something seems to be happening here. Oh yes, the text is clearly getting smaller. At this rate, we won't be legible for long. Can't stop it. Must try to conserve energy. Oh Lordy, would you look at that, we've turned pink. People are gonna get the wrong idea. Gotta stop writing.................................Ah, it's no use. May Day, May Day! We're goin in the drink! Nothing left to do but sing a familiar song. This one's one of my favorites. It goes a little something like this. "You've gotta accent-tchu-ate the positive, eli-my-nate the negative, Latch on to the affirmative, don't mess with Mister In-between. You gotta spread joy up to the maximum, bring gloom down to the minimum. Have faith or pandemonium's li'ble to walk upon the scene. To illustrate my last remark, Jonah in the whale, Noah in the Ark, What did they do when everything looked so dark, Man, they said we better Accent-tchu-ate the positive...", Wait a minute here. Hey, you know what, it seems to have stopped. I think we've weathered the storm. Perhaps my tune of optimism brought us through it after all. Go figure. Well, at any rate, I've come to appreciate text size like I never have before. Somehow, Spaceman fashion just doesn't seem so important anymore. Let the silly little bastards go around in their silver body suits for all I care. There's more important things in life. And you know what, now that I think about it, maybe those silly little bastards knew that all along. Maybe inside their big green heads was the realization that outerwear is insignificant. An understanding that it's what's inside that counts. My goodness, I've had a revelation here today. Those spacemen are onto something. From this day forth, I will look at them in a new light. God bless the silly little spacemen for staying true to themselves and showing me the way.
Look at this little fella in his silver one piece. Would you get a load of the size of those hands? I'd kill for hands like those. Hands that could so easily palm a basketball. Hold it out there like Jordan just daring someone to come try and take it away. Oh yes, if I had those hands you'd see me out there on the hardwood, talkin trash and bringing it to the hole. Hands like those could make up for the fact that I'm a slow, average sized, mildly over-weight white guy with absolutely no leaping ability. And then of course there's my complete lack of coordination. OK, I guess I would be a work in progress. Maybe a guy who could come off the bench and provide some valuable minutes during garbage time. But at least I'd do better than a 3 foot green guy who's gotta be absurdly top heavy. What a waste of such glorious hands.
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