THE GOSPEL ACCORDING TO GOO
COURAGE UNDER FIRE
That cold day in December will forever be burned into my brain. It was Miss Savickey’s fourth grade class at John “The Cougar” Melloncamp Elementary. It was Friday. Show and Tell Friday, and it was my turn to stand in front of the class. You can imagine how hard this was to muster up the courage to stand up there exposed in front of the entire class. All those eyes beading down on you judging. What if they didn’t like what I had brought? Kids can be so cruel.
However, I muckled up like a man and walked to the front of the class. I went to speak, but found myself tongue tied. My palms were clammy and I could feel the beads of sweat forming on my forehead. “Hi”…I finally said… “As you know my name is Goo.” Now, I didn’t know what came over me but I began to gain my composure and the words began rolling from my tongue effortlessly as I continued… “Today for show and tell I have brought with me my Penis to share with the class. Here it is now” I said unzippering my fly. “Hello Mr. Penis, how are you today.” “I’m great” I said responding, speaking in my deep penis voice as I shook it. “Wave to the class Penis.”
I will never forget that day. The day that I gained my confidence. Still even to this very day I always feel comfortable speaking in front of a classroom of kids with my penis out. Of course not fourth graders, that would be just sick, but those High School girls on the other hand…Although now-a-days I don’t really get the opportunity to do this, since the arrest for indecent exposure at that church luncheon, but that is a story for another day.
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