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from Goo, Buckshot and the Kid (The Fearsome Threesome)

The Truth About Pooh?

It's a hypothesis some have called ludicrous. The notion that Pooh is not a real bear. That, in fact, he is a honey crazed man in a bear suit. But is this idea really so far fetched? Let's take a closer look. On the left we have a real live bear. On the right we have Pooh. Granted the similarity between the bears is uncanny, however, there are two subtle yet distinct differences. If you study the photo closely, you will notice that the real bear is a nice normal bear color while Pooh is bright yellow. This seems a bit odd to say the least. And the other and perhaps more significant difference. You probably won't pick it up on your own, but once I reveal it, you will agree that it is clearly unmistakable. The real bear is naked as real bears usually are while Pooh is wearing a nifty little red shirt with his name embroidered on it. Granted he has no pants, but still, before I am willing to call him a real bear, you're gonna have to first explain that damn shirt to me.

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Random Strange Thoughts from the Kid

They say “Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.” If you think it through, that must mean that there aren’t any scorned women in Hell. So now you know why I spend so much of my time in drag trying to get people to scorn me. The way I see it, that’s my ticket to Heaven. Of course, it’s fairly easy finding potential scorners when you’re a six foot two inch weird guy running around in a dress. Most folks you approach do tend to scorn you, after all. But then there’s the little technicality of my not actually being a woman. I sometimes wonder if God will overlook that. I tell ya, things would be so much more straight forward if the saying simply could have been “Hell hath no fury like a lazy dude who tends to over eat and enjoys watching sports."

My friend told me that I should see that “Omen” movie. He said it would “scare the pants off me” but I’m a bit skeptical. I don’t know, it’s just that I simply can’t imagine any possible scenario in which I would become so frightened that I would feel compelled to remove my slacks. Then again, it would give me a good excuse to run through the theater naked, so I may have to see it after all.

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Random Thoughts from Goo Goblins

I sometimes take birdbaths naked. Think about it!

Whenever I meet someone’s new baby I like to look down at the infant and then smile at the parents, figuring they’re probably sick of hearing, “the babies so cute,” instead I like to tell them “Looks like a shitbird if you ask me.”

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Random Thoughts from Buckshot the Bandit

Do you ever roll out of bed and think I want today to have a theme? Well I do and today's theme was corn. I ate corn (creamed... from a can), I thought about the journey of corn (from seed to my dinner plate), and I wrote 2 songs about corn (still untitled but one involves kernals in my feces). Maybe tomorrow will bring a new theme but for today I've got corn and that's just fine by me!

Buckshot once hit Chuck Norris and when Chuck woke up, his clothes WERE out of style.

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